You: "Poop. Poo. Poo. Poo."
Me: "Xander, please don't use bathroom words."
You: "-dle. Poodle."
You: "Poodle. Poodle, poodle, poodle. A poodle is a type of dog, mom. They're rescue dogs."
Me: "I don't think they are."
You: "Poo......dle. Poo. Dle."
Me: "Xander. Enough. I know what you are doing, please stop. We don't care."
You: "You don't care about me?"
Me: "I don't care about poodles."
You: "You should care about poodles, mom. If you don't care about them, they won't rescue you when you need to be rescued."
Your father: "I think you're getting poodles confused with St. Bernards."
Me: "I need a drink."
You: "Jake, when I am 18 I am going to MIT."
Jake: "What's MIT?"
You: "It's the school where they teach you to make the Iron Man suit."
You: "Mom, when I am 18 I am going to war. You can go to war when you're 18."
Me: "Let's go back to talking about poodles. Where's my drink?"